Vivacious Viv

2011-10-05T20:42:00.000-05:00

"Lord Undo Me"

I don’t really worship these day
I don’t really stand up to praise you with songs
Or prayers or actions
or with anything
I am full of all the right moves
I am full of all the right words
I am full of all the right religion
But it is all just illusion
I am really
Lonely
Lost
Calloused
Jaded
Cynical
Too religious
Too realistic
and well really just to lazy
to worship you anymore
I have lost my first love
I have lost the joy of your presence
But most of all I have lost the fear of your glory

Father I need to see you again
Like Isaiah I want to stand in awe of your glory
To fall down at your feet
To come face to face with your
Perfection,
Radiance,
Goodness,
Holiness,
Awesomeness
I want to stand before you and see you for who you are
and me for who I am
I want to be undone

I want to know me for who I really am
I want to see the depths of my heart
And know that you are the only way
You are the only truth
You are the only life
I want to see me and understand
What it really must have taken for you to
Love me
Care for me
See me
Speak to me
Want me
Communicate with me
Die for me
Die for me
Die for me

Lord, I want to stand in that place where all I can see is your glory
And my sin
Because in that place I can’t help but worship you.
Lord let me come undone
Undo my heart
Lord, undo my heart
break down these walls that I love so much
No, wait don’t,
I’m scared I don’t know if I can handle this
don’t
But I can’t live this way anymore
I can’t stand here in this half-life
this going through the motions life
this not really alive life
Father, I need you so come in and do what you must
Cut out the tumor on my heart
Break down the walls that I love
Lord let me come undone
Undo my heart
let me worship you again

*Blake Williams

Update

2010-01-18T21:40:00.002-06:00

This is my update in a complete sentence.

Paper Anniversary!

2009-07-22T21:06:00.003-05:00

It seems like I've misplaced my blog. I could blame facebook or it might be that all my updates come from a different blog. It just doesn't seem to have any point. Whatever the reason I'm sorry I haven't been updating.
The most recent news is that Matt and I have just celebrated our first year of marriage. It was the paper anniversary. One of the things that I've learned about the two of us is that we like to be unique but also stick with tradition. We didn't plan on giving each other paper but that's what we ended up giving each other. I decided to write him a personal romance novel. It only got the part when Matt and I first became a dating couple but at least it's started. Matt gave me this very accomplished drawing of our first year of marriage. I had to bring it to work with me to show everybody.

The main way we celebrated our anniversary though is through a road trip. We left Friday and drove across Nebraska to see Chimney Rock and Car Henge. Then we drove up into South Dakota to see Mount Rushmore, Crazy Horse, Wall Drug, and the town of Vivian!! It was refreshing to get away. On the road Matt and I were reminiscing about the wedding day and listening to the book Ender's Game.

Letter to my blog

2008-12-07T09:42:00.003-06:00

Hello Blog. I've missed you. I hope everything has been going good. Things have been fine here. I got married about 3 and a half months ago and I've been learning as much as I can. We got our first Christmas tree yesterday. That was such an adventure! We went to an actual Christmas tree farm! I haven't been to one of those since I was a kid. We didn't stay long however; since the weather was too cold for us. I didn't really like those trees anyway. After going home to get Matt's coat it was much more fun. We just decided to go to the same place I go ever year. They seem to always have great trees. We found the perfect one! After putting it up and going to the store a couple times we ended the day with watching the Christmas Vacation and sipping hot eggnog together. It was a really great day blog. Well it's about time to get ready for church so I'll sign off for now. I'll write again soon.

Love,
Viv

Saying Goodbye To The Land Of Dunkin

2008-07-26T10:28:00.001-05:00

BISQUE

2008-07-22T20:49:00.000-05:00

We had bisque the first night in Maine! I have to say that the bisque in Maine is absolutely wonderful!

One more day

2008-07-18T15:15:00.002-05:00

Well I'm getting married tomorrow. Everybody said the time would go fast. They were right. The day of marrying the man of my dreams is almost here. I have been a lot less stressed then I thought I would be. I have many people working hard to help make everything a success. They seem to be the stressed out ones. Today I have been just trying to get as much alone time in as possible. People keep asking me what I'm looking forward to the most. I keep telling most of them the same answer. To see many of the social worlds in our lives combined into one. We got family, Jitterbugs, Bible study members, Comic Genesis friends, and co-workers coming. It's going to be amazing to see and I'm really looking forward to the fun that will had.

Royals Game!!!

2008-07-09T13:30:00.002-05:00

Having fun at the game!

All DONE!!!!!

2008-03-27T19:20:00.002-05:00

I am so happy. I finally got finished with my taxes.
Powered by Jott

I'M ENGAGED!!!!!!!!!!!

2008-01-27T20:03:00.000-06:00

I'M ENGAGED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Matt proposed to me this afternoon!! I was completely surprised. This is how it happened. Matt told me yesterday that he lost his thumb drive. He asked me today if we could go down to the Eagles Lodge to look since he wasn't able to find it in his car. We went down there and looked around. After awhile he tossed his thumb drive on the table and said I didn't loose anything. He then took out two speakers and said he reserved the place until 4 o'clock so we could dance. We dance 3 songs. The first one was Unchanged Melody. The second was The Time of My Life from dirty dancing and the third was Let's Call the Hole Thing Off. After having fun goofing off and dancing the them to Ghost came on and Matt and I were standing in the spot where he first asked me to dance. He said; do you know what this place is. I replied it's where you first asked me to dance. He said yes and now I need to ask you another question. He got down on one knee and said Vivian for last year you have been the light of my life and now it's my turn to ask you do you want to make it official, Vivian Marie Taber will you marry me. Then I said Yeaaah!!!!!!!!!!

message from North Carolyna

2007-12-28T10:34:00.000-06:00

Matt sent me this picture yesterday. It said on it "wish you were here." I wish I was there too. I miss him soooo much.

November Post

2007-11-29T18:53:00.000-06:00

Hey! I don't have a post for November!! It's almost done. Not much to say I guess. Still having a great time with Matt. I'm starting to feel the Christmas spirit. I love this time of year. On Saturday Jenny and I are planning on getting our Christmas tree. We haven't had much luck with those the last two years. Two years ago we got one with sharp needles. It hurt us every time we put an ornament on. Last year we got one with a sway trunk and couldn't figure out why it kept leaning to one side. We cut off half the tree before we figured it out. I'm really hoping this year will be different. I think we know what we're doing now.

Generous Friends

2007-10-01T18:14:00.000-05:00

Sheeze!! This blog is turning into like one of my other journals! For some reason writing and I seem to come in seasons. I can't promise I'm going to keep this up but I have to say something about the awesome weekend I just had. Thursday was my birthday and it started out with a decorated desk and a dozen roses sent to me at lunch time.

Matt was the first one to ever send me flowers. They were so beautiful. That night my parents, Matt and I went out to the Outback to get my blooming onion. I love that thing. My mom also made me a cake for the first time

Matt and I both got the next day off so we spent the hole day together. We went to The Dinner. I have been wanting to try them for a long time. Matt then showed me a neighborhood that he really liked. I saw why he liked it so much. The trees were Huge!! Before we went dancing at JNO we met up with some of my co-workers over at Old Chicago.

The next day Matt dropped me off at my parents house to spend the morning with my dad on his birthday. We had a nice breakfast with each other and at 3:30 Matt picked me up to go to my birthday party. He had been working very hard preparing something special all day. I had expected a great time hanging out with everybody and a couple things. When I got there however; they completely blew me out of the water. Friends had helped Matt decorate my friend Eric's house with my favorite color. Matt had prepared some baked potatoes for people to fix up and my friends were EXTREMELY generous

This year has to be one of the best birthdays I've ever had. Thank you Matt and all my really generous friends. You all made me feel very loved.

Happy Birthday Matt!!!!

2007-08-29T00:01:00.000-05:00

YAHOO! YAHOO!!!!

It's my man's birthday today!!! I'm so glad this guy was born. His name means gift of God and he has truly been a gift. I love him very much and I can't wait to celebrate his day.

Happy Birthday Matt!!!!!

I FINALLY GOT ONE!!!

2007-08-15T18:54:00.001-05:00

I HAVE A FLICKR ACCOUNT!!!!!!!!

I haven't updated because I've been bound and determined that my next post will have pictures from my trip. I'm not putting pictures on the post BUT I have something better... A flickr account!! I finally got one thanks to my awesome boyfriend Matt! So far it only holds pictures from my trip but I hope to add more later. Next Step... getting a digital camera.

http://flickr.com/photos/vivaciousviv/

Short road trip recap

2007-06-16T13:47:00.000-05:00

Well Jenny and I have come back from our week long adventure. It has been an absolutely amazing trip. We traveled a total of 2,416 miles. I knew I was going to have fun but I didn't expect to enjoy myself as much as I did. I wrote in my journal Thursday night that I feel so refreshed and happy. Like I didn't just take a break from work but that I've done something extraordinary. On the way home Friday night Jenny I brain stormed some things we learned on our travels. Here is some of the stuff we came up with.

1. Make sure you're aware of the speed limit. Being from out of state is not an
excuse.
2. Your knees need sunscreen too!
3. To avoid forest fires, if your camp stove is leaking gas clean it up before
lighting it again!
4. Make sure you have your pillow!
5. Get to your campsite before dark. Putting it up with the light of a small
flashlight is not fun.
6. Soak charcoal before lighting
7. The bumpy things on the side of the road are rumble strips, Not vibrators!
8. Make sure you have extra batteries
9. Be careful where you shine your flashlight in the outhouse.
10. Make sure you look at a current calender when making reservations!
11. Use caution in the trains bathroom if it's going to be starting or stopping soon!
12. Money is not waterproof!
13. Saloon girl costumes are too short, especially for tall people!!

Jenny knows how to choo choo to boogie

2007-06-12T09:05:00.001-05:00

Jenny knows how to choo choo to boogie

Choo Choo!

2007-06-12T08:56:00.001-05:00

Choo Choo!

You have new Picture Mail!

2007-06-11T18:46:00.001-05:00

Mexican in Durango! We are tired after 5 hours of rafting so we deserve a treat.

2007-06-11T08:56:00.000-05:00

Unfortunatly I'm unable to get phone service in most places out here so I can't update like I would like. I'm taking lots of pictures for later.

Colorado gives us a Bear hug welcome!

2007-06-10T19:16:00.001-05:00

Colorado gives us a Bear hug welcome!

You have new Picture Mail!

2007-06-10T19:13:00.001-05:00

You have new Picture Mail!

2007-06-10T19:08:00.001-05:00

Big attraction in Kansas! The birth place of Anne Oakley AND Large prairie dog!

2007-06-09T08:34:00.001-05:00

We have gone 341 miles so far. Both of us are getting really excited that we get to see mountains today!

2007-06-08T23:17:00.001-05:00

We stopped short of where we wanted to go since we are both really tired. We are settling down just outside Hays Kansas. Tomorrow we head to CO.

Jenny... I don't think we are in Nebraska anymore...

2007-06-08T22:48:00.001-05:00

Jenny... I don't think we are in Nebraska anymore...

2007-06-08T18:04:00.000-05:00

Jenny and I are officially on are way to big adventure!

Yucky :-(

2007-05-31T13:19:00.000-05:00

Okay I need to whine. I came home early from work today. I don't know what I got but it's not fun. I made myself cancel my date with Matt last night and I cancelled my lesson tonight. For those who know me well know how much I also hate missing work especially at this time when I have to finish everything. I would spare the public details except I don't have any. I just feel rotten. I did have a sore throat on Monday but it went away. Well now I guess the smell of food makes my tummy... nevermind. I just hope this goes away soon. I need God to heal me. There is a lot of good things coming up this weekend. I want to fully enjoy them and the people I love.

Viv Knowledge- Answers

2007-05-28T16:26:00.000-05:00

Matt Johnson Won 1st Place in the Viv Knowledge quiz with high score of 56!!! 6 people gave it a try. The lowest score was 42. Thank you to the ones that participated.

Easy (1pt)
1. Cheese is Gross! False
2. I love computers False
3. I can't eat corn False
4. I like anything blue True
5. It's not hot... It has a little _____ Kick

Not as Easy(2pt)
1. The more salt the better. True! I love salty stuff
2. Kansas City is the biggest city I've been in. False! I grew up by San Francisco
3. I must throw away flowers when I'm done with them. False! I'm way too sentimental for that
4. Cleaning is fun. False!
5. You can never have enough ______ on a hamburger. Pickles!!! I used to get made fun of for this.

Getting Tougher(3pt)
1. Snakes are Awesome!! False!
2. I love playing volleyball. TRUE! I feel it's the only sport I'm relatively well in.
3. I have to keep every card I get. True!
4. I played the drums for 2 years. True!
5. My favorite ethnic food is _______ Mexican!!

Hard(4pt)
1. I enjoy wearing jewelry. False!
2. Sometimes I feel like a nut. True! I love Cashews!
3. I've had a bird named after me! True!! It was my birds Niece!
4. I've been to NASA. True! That was one of the spots I was taken to when I was in the science academy
5. My favorite show as a kid was _______ PUNKEY BREWSTER!!!! Two people got this right! Good Job!

Seriously(5pt)
1. I used to draw. True
2. I made a speech at my 6th grade graduation ceremony. True! Out of 90 students the principle picked my speech and asked me to present it at graduation.
3. My parents met at a theater. False! Square Dancing
4. My best subject when I was a kid was math. True! I loved It! It was some of the only homework I did back then.
5. The first type of dancing I learned was ____ ____ ______ Greek Folk Dancing. Know body got this one. I took classes with my mom at one of the community colleges in California

Vivacious Viv Knowledge

2007-05-24T20:00:00.000-05:00

This post was inspired by Onionboy. It seemed like a lot of fun. I have prepared a list of true or false questions. Answer each question and send your answer to vivtruke@yahoo.com

The contest will be held through Memorial Day. Whoever gets the most points will receive a prize!!!!

Questions are true/false, and fill-in-the-blank. 75pts possible. Revised answers are allowed and encouraged. Your last entry will be the counted one.

Easy (1pt)
1. Cheese is Gross!
2. I love computers
3. I can't eat corn
4. I like anything blue
5. It's not hot... It has a little _____

Not as Easy(2pt)
1. The more salt the better
2. Kansas City is the biggest city I've been in
3. I must throw away flowers when I'm done with them
4. Cleaning is fun
5. You can never have enough ______ on a hamburger

Getting Tougher(3pt)
1. Snakes are Awesome!!
2. I love playing volleyball
3. I have to keep every card I get
4. I played the drums for 2 years
5. My favorite ethnic food is _______

Hard(4pt)
1. I enjoy wearing jewelry
2. Sometimes I feel like a nut
3. I've had a bird named after me
4. I've been to NASA
5. My favorite show as a kid was _______

Seriously(5pt)
1. I used to draw
2. I made a speech at my 6th grade graduation ceremony
3. My parents met at a theater
4. My best subject when I was a kid was math
5. The first type of dancing I learned was ____ ____ ______

Spring Night!!

2007-05-10T21:17:00.000-05:00

It has been two incredible spring nights. I hope everybody has gotten a chance to get out and enjoy the weather we have been having!! Last night Matt and I had a date in the Old Market. After eating dinner outside we walked all around the Gene Leahy Mall. Most of the spots we went to were the same ones as our first date back in December. This time however; it was warm enough for us to dance by the fountain while it changed colors. It was wonderful!!
Tonight was a little warmer but Jenny and I still decided to take a long bike ride down the Key Stone Trail. That trail is really beautiful in some areas. We passed by many baseball games and turned around where some small children were playing soccer.
I think I'm going to spend the rest of the evening eating blueberries on reading a book that I have been putting off.

April post

2007-04-30T17:44:00.000-05:00

Okay, I seriously need to have at least 1 post for each month. It's a weird obsession. Today is May 1st and I seem to have not posted for April. How did that happen? I'm going to date this for April because that is when I was thinking about this stuff.
Um....
Um...
This trip in June is coming up quickly...
When are the leaves going to start coming on the trees?...
I really want more vacation time...
Matt is such an awesome guy...
I'm sleepy...

IRIS!!

2007-03-29T13:06:00.001-05:00

IRIS!!

Night of Memories

2007-03-28T17:58:00.000-05:00

Last Monday was such a night to remember. Matt and I went on a date and saw the production of CATS done by Millard North High School. We had both always wanted to see it. The picture shows one of them singing my favorite song from the show "Memory". The students did a great job!!
Before the show I got to show Matt around my church. I loved showing him that place. I got to show him where I used to sing, pray, do my homework, and have youth group. I will not say how much his interest touched my heart.
When we left the church we picked up some Arbys and went down to the Missouri River. Matt had brought a blanket that his grandmother made so we found a good spot to put it down. It was the perfect night to have dinner by the river. The whole night was very special.

Joys of good weather

2007-03-15T18:36:00.001-05:00

It's getting warmer!!! I've been enjoying it immensely. On Tuesday I took my bike out for a long bike ride. I've been leaving the sliding door open and sitting in the sun. The activity I have been enjoying the most however is watching the kids play outside. We don't have any play equipment but just a lot of grass. They have been chasing each other, kicking balls, playing catch, sitting on blankets, and doing a LOT of laughing. About 10 minutes ago I heard one of them counting. When I looked out the window I saw a boy about 6 years old running very fast somewhere. He apparently knew where the others were hiding. Kids bring so much joy just by being themselves. I hope everybody else is enjoying this weather.

In Lincoln

2007-03-13T20:52:00.000-05:00

Okay so I haven't posted anything in almost a month. I don't really have a good excuse. I've just been focusing on other things and have not felt like it. I wish I did keep this thing up to date. The last month has been absolutely amazing. Two months ago I could say that I've never driven to Lincoln. Now I can say that I've driven there at least 4 times. In my most recent trip Matt and I had a great time touring the capital building and eating sandwiches in the park. After that we went to see the Newsboys in concert. I had seem before about 10 years ago at an Acquire the Fire conference and have appreciated them since I was 15 years old. They were awesome!! The best time however; was just spending time with Matt. He got some great pictures of our day together.

I recently witnessed a two year old take a perfect picture... and so can a railing

Matt and I at the very top of the capital building in Lincoln. I'm looking for the Woodmen tower.

NEWSBOYS!!!! I think this is right before the breakfast song!!

Flapper part II

2007-02-16T19:14:00.001-06:00

Matt took this video of Flapper doing what he has done since he was a baby. For some reason he likes any food that is in my mouth. He also has always had a strange infatuation with himself.

Drowned Rat... Um I Mean Bird

2007-02-03T20:43:00.001-06:00

I took a shower with my bird Flapper last night. He was really starting to smell like B.O. (Bird Odor) and needed a bath. I used to give him a bath a little more regularly and really should start doing it more often. Isn't he cute!!!

Shrimp Alfredo!

2007-01-29T19:32:00.000-06:00

Matt and I had a great time on Sunday night. After picking up the Panera Bread for my agency we decided to get some cream cheese to put on some of the bagels. In the store we get the idea to make shrimp alfredo. I think it turned out well except I wish I had more sauce. However; that didn't matter. I just love spending time with this guy.

New Weekend

2007-01-21T12:04:00.001-06:00

This has been a great weekend so far. Before going to the dance on Friday a group of people went to Jazz. We eat Cajun food and danced to the Dixie Land Band. Like most experiences dancing outside the Eagles people responded to us very positively. I heard a couple admirers saying "Wow!" They could have also been responding to the price of all you eat hush puppies but I like to think of them as responding to the boogie drop Matt and I did.
After a couple dances we went down to the Bellevue Social Hall. I enjoyed this venue much better then the Eagles. It was cleaner and seemed to have more room. Towards the end of the night there was just a hand full of people and they started playing music we don't usually hear at JNO. People began to cut loose. We got into a circle and did whatever we felt like. I'm not sure if I've ever seen so many Jitterbugs rolling around on the floor. It was so much fun

The start of what will soon be a huge craze

Last night a very large group went and saw my favorite local comedy team 88 Improve. They were hilarious and put on a really good show. Matt got to go up on stage and strike some poses. It was obvious he had drama experience because he did a great job.

I'm really looking forward to Terra Nova tonight.

Thanks to Jittercliff for the photo

Random Thoughts

2007-01-16T19:13:00.000-06:00

I'm not sure what to post about. I just feel like posting. First of all...thank you for all the words of encouragement I got in response to my previous post.
I am making today a day of rest. This last week as been very enjoyable. I've spent almost all my time hanging out with friends and family. I just want to relax tonight.
Jenny bought a new vacuum cleaner so the living room is filled with a new appliance smell. I love that smell. We finally got the things picked up that have been driving both of us nuts for weeks.
My oldest bird has always been the adventurous type. When he was a baby he would go exploring in the living room. Sometimes I would have trouble finding him. In the last couple of days he has figured out how to get out of his cage through an opening in the top. I don't know how to fix the situation yet... I could just keep the blanket over them but they need light... SCREEN!!! I could get screen!! Does anybody know where to find that stuff?
I think I'll sleep on it.

Life in the fast lane

2007-01-04T19:08:00.000-06:00

Most of the time I work in a good environment but I was involved in breaking up another fight yesterday. I've been in plenty of them. This one wasn't nearly as bad as the one I was in several weeks ago or others in the past 6 years. They weren't attacking me this time and I didn't get hit. I'm getting real concerned however; that I'm loosing myself. I used to be so strong mentally.
One of the reason might be is that I feel like I don't really have somebody to talk to. Don't misunderstand me. I have wonderful friends and I love them very much. I know some of them would do anything for me. I just feel like they have there separate worlds, own issues to deal with, and simply can't understand. My co-workers would understand but I have to be professional there. I don't like being happy/strong all day and then having the people I'm closest to get depression from me.
Last night however; there was some things I was thankful for. I had things to do and friends to see after work so I didn't let myself get emotional until 10pm. It makes me feel like I can still do what God called me to do but it's getting harder and harder.
The last couple weeks I've been thinking about the differences between my life 6 years ago and now. There were ways I kept myself above water back then. The most obvious difference is that I had a stronger relationship with God. I've been trying to incorporate the same activities into my life that I used to do. I figure it's a good start to finding out what I need. Years ago when I got depressed I would pop in a worship CD, walk to the park, and pray. When I got back it was like nothing ever happened. Today I went to Target and got myself a CD player and a case to hook around my waist. I got home, took it out of the package, put it all together, and realized I didn't have any AA batteries... oops. It was frustrating until I realized that these will be waiting for me later.
I know this post might seem too personal but I can't keep it in anymore. If my praying friends read this please remember me. Thank you

2006 Review

2006-12-31T17:05:00.000-06:00

The last day of 2006. In the last couple of days I've been thinking about all the stuff I've done this past year. Like everybody else this year has been full of good and not so good memories. It has been a year of growth for me. Some of my view points have completely changed since last year. Here are some good things I want to remember.

1. Dancing at the Durham Western Heritage museum
2. Going to see the African Children's Choir
3. Winning the exercise queen
4. Participants that have passed away
5. My mom dancing at Lindy in the Park
6. Camping in Louisville
7. Marching in a couple parades with the Jitterbugs
8. Being the Lion in the Wizard of Oz day
9. The Jitterbugs coming and dancing at FP
10. Winning 3rd place in Omaha Corn Eating contest for the second year in a row
11. Watching my parents square dance again
12. South Dakota trip
13. People leaving food in my car
14. Quality walks with friends
15. Having a sleep over with my Bible study
16. Playing golf with Onionboy
17. My birthday party
18. Jenny's birthday party
And many many others....

I HOPE YOU ALL HAVE A HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!

Christmas 2006

2006-12-31T15:00:00.000-06:00

Well I'm a little late but here is my final Christmas post. I hope everybody had memorable time celebrating Jesus's birthday! This season seemed to catch up to me way too fast but it turned out great! On Christmas Eve I went to a beautiful candle light service and then to my parent's house to spend the night. On Christmas day my friends Onionboy, Venche, Hugh, Sherry, and Rob came over.
The next day some of us met at Onionboy's house to celebrate Robin and Tim's meeting anniversary.

My mom got some cake decorating items. She loves to decorate cakes so I know she'll have fun with those.

Venche and Onionboy decided to give me cheese. Why would they do that?

Oh Yeah!! Because I am the Cheese Queen!! Thank you to Onionboy for making me this shirt!!

Onionboy talking about how long it takes him to open a present.

To view more visit http://onion-boy.blogspot.com//

Miss lumber jack Viv

2006-12-17T00:25:00.000-06:00

I couldn't believe the trouble this tree caused us but we eventually got it up. It kept falling over. We tried to make it a little more secure in the stand by cutting of some branches. After that it still would not stand up so we cut off about a foot from the bottom. Finally Onionboy come over and told us the log was curved. He got the ingenious idea to put something underneath the stand to prop it up on one side. Problem Solved!!

Thankyou Onionboy!!

O Christmas tree, O Christmas tree...

Christmas Quiz

2006-12-02T13:09:00.001-06:00

Okay it's after the 1st of December. Time for the Christmas posts!

1. Egg Nog or Hot Chocolate?
-- Egg Nog- especially with a little bit of Rum extract or brandy

2. Does Santa wrap presents or just set them under the tree?
-- wrapped.

3. Colored lights on tree/house or white?
-- colored on both.

4. Do you hang mistletoe?
-- no.

5. When do you put your decorations up?
-- The weekend after Thanksgiving or after the 1st of December

6. What is your favorite holiday dish?
-- My families poppy seed bread, stuffing, and green bean casserole

7. Favorite Christmas memory as a child?
-- On Christmas Eve having a nice dinner at my uncle's house and then riding in the car looking at all the decorated "Big" houses. They had so many lights on them.

8. When and how did you learn the truth about Santa?
-- I don't remember

9. Do you open a gift on Christmas Eve?
-- yes, When I was a kid my brother and I always opened the gifts we got for each other on Christmas Eve

10. How do you decorate your Christmas Tree?
-- With different colored lights and many ornaments. Some of them I made myself when I was little.
11. Snow! Love it or Dread it?
-- It's pretty but annoying

12. Can you ice skate?
-- Yes!! It's one of my favorite Christmas traditions!

13. Do you remember your favorite gift?
-- can I avoid this question?

14. What's your favorite thing about the holidays?
-- 1) That almost everywhere you go songs about Jesus are being played and God reminding me how much He loves us
-- 2) Looking at Christmas lights
-- 3) singing carols.

15. What is your favorite Holiday Dessert?
-- Pumkin Pie and mincemeat Pie

16. What is your favorite holiday tradition?
-- The candle light service and Going through Christmas stockings with my family and friends.

17. What tops your tree?
-- a golden star.

19. What is your favorite Christmas Song?
-- O Holy Night

20. Candy Canes! Yuck or Yum?
-- yum.

21. What's number one on your Christmas list this year?
-- The same thing every year...

Thank you Onionboy for this quiz

End of an Era

2006-11-24T12:45:00.000-06:00

Well it's done now. After 5 years of service my first car has gone on to serve other cars in need. I loved that car. We went everywhere together. It had character. Some people said it was a piece of junk but it's little problems made it mine. I must move on now and give the rolling prune my full attention. *sigh*

Happy Thanksgiving

2006-11-23T03:44:00.000-06:00

What am I thankful for?...
Jesus
My Bible
A place to work
An apartment to live in
A wonderful roommate
My friends and family
3 cute birds
The Jitterbug group
A moving car aka the "rolling prune"
The ability to do things
The beautiful weather that has been going on lately
My talents and weaknesses
At the moment the chicken broth and noodles cooling down
All other food
and things learned

HAPPY THANKSGIVING EVERYBODY!!!!

Party in the House

2006-11-11T14:51:00.000-06:00

I didn't make it to Jitterbugs last night. Some friends and I decided to have a sleep over. I remember having a slumber party once when I was about 11. This one was a little different. It was so much fun. We eat pizza and roasted marshmallows. We played twister and apples to apples, and need for speed on the play station. Of course we also had to play an exciting game of Truth or Dare. I chose mostly truth but when we had a bunch of people choosing truth I decided to change it up with a dare. They played some hip hop music and made me dance like I was in club. One picture was taken but I can figure out a way to get rid of it.
This morning we all went down to get manicures. The last time I got a manicure it was for 13th birthday. That was also an experience. It was kind of weird being on the other side of the table. I'm so used to painting other people's nails. It didn't take me long to chip a couple of them. That made me a little mad but I'm still enjoying them. I love how smooth they've gotten. Now I'm home and trying to decided what I'm going to do tonight. Nap time.

Senses

2006-11-09T09:14:00.000-06:00

I know it's been awhile since I've posted. To be honest I've had a post completely written out in my head for weeks now but have been afraid to write it.
I can't think about posting anything else. My thoughts have begun to calm down a lot. I still don't want to post what's been going on but I think I'm ready to start writing again.
Last night I talked my friend onionboy into going for a walk with me. The night was perfect for it. I'm trying to get out and experience as much of the fall season as I can. I know it's almost over. This season has always been my favorite. I love the colors and how refreshing everything feels. I think I've been noticing it more this year.
When I was younger and something unpleasant was going on in my life I used sink into the details of things around me. I would examine the cracks in wood, veins in leaves, spider webs, and pretty much everything else. I still do that in a way. With all the things I've been feeling lately that might be one of the reasons why fall has been standing out this year.
I don't know however; if depression is the reason for increased senses. I know in my head I'm experiencing signs of depression but I hate putting my senses in a negative category.
I like to think of them more as God's pleasant distraction or a means of bringing me back to Himself. Long before I knew who God really was and even long before I stepped into church, I thought of God as Creature. Enjoying the outdoors is one of ways I feel close to Him. Now that I think about it, it actually makes sense that God would increase my senses if I'm having hard time. Enjoying what's around me makes me feel alive. Anyway, I'll try to post a little more often.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY JENNY!!!

2006-10-19T00:01:00.000-05:00

IT'S JENNY'S BIRTHDAY TODAY!!!! YAHOO!! I HOPE IT'S A WONDERFUL YEAR FOR YOU!!!

Cool Tree.

2006-10-18T17:26:00.000-05:00

This is one of the trees outside my apartment. Only God can make death look this beautiful.

FORE!!!!

2006-10-09T17:46:00.000-05:00

I played my first real game of golf yesterday. One of my friends taught me how to swing a golf club a couple months ago. We just swung the club around at grass so I wasn't sure if I'd be able to hit some balls. I've been wanting to try it out so Onionboy took me out to Milt's for there par 3 course. It turned out it wasn't as hard as I thought it would be. I played very much like a beginner but I was still able to get the ball off the ground a couple of times. Onionboy had so much patients. He did much better then me. I got a 51 and he got a 31. It was a lot of fun and surprisingly very relaxing. I loved being out in the fresh air.
Speaking of fresh air I've taken my bike out a couple of times this last week. Riding in this fall air is extremely energizing. I can't describe the joy I feel after riding for an hour or two. I've forgotten how much doing things outside makes me happy. I want more.

Timberrrrrrr

2006-10-04T19:46:00.000-05:00

I had to drop some stuff off so I went home for lunch yesterday. On my way back to work I was walking down a grassy hill and my feet decided they wanted to slide out from under me. I tried to catch myself but managed to twist my shoulder instead. Everybody knows I have bad shoulders. The backs of them have been hurting for a couple years. Now the front of one wants to join in. I could barely hold a cup or push a chair in yesterday. I know I'm improving because I was able to tickle people by the evening hours. I'll wait a couple days before I look into going to the doctor.

The Big 27

2006-10-01T01:34:00.000-05:00

Alright... I'm feeling pretty loved. I had my 27th birthday this past week. I think this has been one of the best birthdays I've ever had this year. I have such wonderful friends.

My day began with finding this lovely display in the kitchen. This touched my heart immediately. My mom used to do these types of things for me.

When I got to work my desk was camouflaged in all sorts of stuff. It was covered in glitter and orange sugar. They made me two birthday hats (one was a spare), a couple cards, and glittered hearts. I had to find my presents by figuring out what the pirate clues said.

What goes around comes around. They stole this picture from me and put it on the white board. I should stop borrowing from people.

After work I went to a party that Mae was planning. She had my favorite snack and desert waiting for me. At this moment I am unaware of the turtle mania that is about to occur. For some reason they decided to give me a turtle theme. I don't think I've ever talked about turtles. When I asked what that was all about reportwritter said "Everybody has to have a theme for there birthday." Okay then, that's cool. I think I might start liking them from now on.

I became member of the comedy group 88 improve (not really)

What's with all the TURTLES!!!!!

This is the turtles eye view of the game Apples to Apples. I think they might have been falling from the ceiling.

My birthday continued on through Friday. I had dinner with some co-workers which was a memorable experience. I wish I could have gotten some pictures of it. After that I went to JNO to hang out with some more awesome people.

It continued on through Saturday. I had dinner with a couple friends, took a walk around Standing Bear Lake, watched a romantic movie, and eat the wonderful cake that Jenny made. Somewhere in between the lake and the cake my friends gave me a blue 21 speed mountain bike. Unfortunately the shock of this has liquefied my ability to put a picture up. I might be able to once I recover.

Thankyou sooo much to all my friends. You really made my birthday something to remember for a long time.

Thankyou also to Jittercliff and Onionboy for some of the photos

2006-09-20T08:16:00.000-05:00

I know there is a 90% chance I can not have a lunch today. Looks like all my coworkers have the same plan. BIG breakfast at McDonalds.

2006-09-18T22:25:00.000-05:00

It has now been 12 years since my first day in church...*sigh* It feels different this year.

Lost and Found

2006-09-12T19:52:00.000-05:00

Found lost sandwich, cookies, and chips. The sales receipt said it was bought at 5:07 today from a Subway. The sandwich is spicy Italian and the cookies are peanut butter. If you are the owner please contact me on my comment section.

My mom and I have been car shopping all evening. We did not stop at a Subway but when we got back to my apartment we found this food in our van. Two logical reasons have risen up in my head. #1 A poor someone made the mistake of thinking our car was there's. They put the food in the van and then left to do something else. #2 The secrete admirer strikes again. Time will tell.

If you know anybody who has lost a sandwich please let me know.

5 Love Languages

2006-09-03T22:52:00.000-05:00

The Five Love Languages

My primary love language is probably
Quality Time
with a secondary love language being
Acts of Service.

Complete set of results

Quality Time:		10
Acts of Service:		8
Receiving Gifts:		6
Physical Touch:		4
Words of Affirmation:		2

Information

Unhappiness in relationships, according to Dr. Gary Chapman, is often due to the fact that we speak different love languages. Sometimes we don't understand our partner's requirements, or even our own. We all have a "love tank" that needs to be filled in order for us to express love to others, but there are different means by which our tank can be filled, and there are different ways that we can express love to others.

Take the quiz

I found this on beckstrardinary's blog. I've read about 3/4 of this book but was never really sure what my love language was. I felt like all of the categories applied to me. I think part of it might depend on what mood I'm in however; quality time makes sense. I can be quiet but I really crave a good conversation. I like playing cards and just enjoying the company of a person.

Viv Rant

2006-09-02T02:50:00.000-05:00

I can't sleep again. When that happens my mind starts racing of issues going on that I might not be fully aware of at my normal functioning level. I would really like to get one them out so I can get some sleep.

I've been angry the last couple of hours. There isn't an exact reason. I've been thinking about how society views Christians. We are all born with the same human/sinful nature. What makes people think that Christians are immune to worldly desires? A close friend told me one time that he felt like he was walking on egg shells around me. I understand that people are going to feel what they feel and I can't change that. It made me feel however; angry, hurt, and incredibly rejected. What makes them feel so special? I've seen other people act the same way my friend did. I wish I can understand the reasoning behind it. I'm human and struggle with issues of anger, envy, lust, greed, selfishness, laziness, and many others. I can easily be condemned. If Christ did not take the penalty for my sins I would be condemned.

The frustration inside me is starting to calm down now. I will take some responsibility for the attitude I mentioned. I haven't been very good at telling my testimony or daily struggles. I can't think of a single person I associate with that knows what I was like before I accepted Christ. That's not right. I will not get into it now. I will say however; that the way I try to live is simply out of love what He has done. My worldly desires and struggles will not go away until I am called home but I know how much God loves every part me.

"I love God's law with all my heart. But there is another law at work within me that is at war with my mind. This law wins the fight and makes me a slave to the sin that is still within me. Oh, what a miserable person I am! Who will free me from this life that is in dominated by sin? Thank God! The answer is in Jesus Christ our Lord..." Romans 7:22-25

Feelin the Love

2006-08-31T17:44:00.000-05:00

My parents always told me that people will tease someone they like. I tend to also do this. My coworkers have been going a little crazy with teasing lately. I've been feeling the love. When I got to work this morning I noticed my trophy had been changed to read "Cowtown Jambore Spelling Bee." For those of you who really know me, you understand how funny this is.

While I was gone at Jamborama they decided to give me a play by play of everything that happened while I was gone. I'm not going to include names or all of the entries because I want my blog to remain G rated. I also know most people will not understand these.

NON OF THE EVENTS are true but rather partially related to the truth.

Friday

1. Payday-everyone here received sizable bonus (sorry Viv) (must have been present to receive said bonus)

2. 3:59pm... B bursts into program area muttering something about Viv not having enouph vacation. Will be discussed upon return.

3. 6:15pm... L and G are still sitting out front waiting for their ride...

4. 7:36pm... Still Waiting

5. 12:23pm... Jitterbugs show up in flesh colored spandex costumes and saddle shoes. K very turned on, inquiring where to find a costume for J and herself.

Monday

8:30am... H announces engagement to C

4:45pm... K still talking about jitterbug costumes and (censored)

5:03pm... H never speaking to C again

5:04pm... Okay, maybe will go with C for coffee later on tonight

10:07am... Questions arise about gender of Elijah. Thought Elijah= male, after finding charting sheet from 8/24 and Viv writing Ellisha, not sure. And how did Viv find out?

CORN, CORN, CORN!!!

2006-08-30T19:14:00.000-05:00

Just as soon as I finished posting last night I noticed that Onionboy had his pictures up. I have to include the Corn Eating Contest.

I'm just starting to get warmed up

Onionboy is making sure his are completely clean

Again Onionboy making sure his ears are spic and span while I'm in the back kicking um... butt

Yes! Victory! I wonder how long it takes to get to the bathroom.

Chris got second place. He still can't stop his mouth from moving

Jamborama Part One and Beyond

2006-08-29T19:09:00.000-05:00

Well we just got done with another Jamborama. I had a very different reaction to this Jamborama then last year. It just wasn't as much fun for me. It did however; have very good moments. I beat my record of 12 ears of corn in 10 minutes to 13 ears in 8 minutes, One of the leads from Minnesota said I was a good Balboa dancer (I didn't think I was), a friend bought me dinner, and I learned some ways to make some moves I already know more interesting. I tried really hard to have more fun. My mom told me my reaction could be because everything was new and exciting last year. Maybe that's it. I did enjoy seeing some of the out of towners come back. I took some of my favorite pictures from jittercliffs photos. I hope to steal some corn eating contest pictures soon as well. These will do for now.

Thursday night at Jazz on the Green

Two of my favorite people at after hours (dancing from Midnight to 5am)

Our instructors doing the Big Apple

I thought these two did the best in the Jack and Jill contest

Functioning on 4 hours of sleep

I'm sitting in the back. Can you see me?

The Weekend Continued

My parents also went dancing this weekend. I haven't seen them in these outfits since I was about 6 years old. My mom once again told me the story of my first steps and how much I was spoiled by all the dancers. I'm not surprised I love this so much. This was the best part of my weekend.

South Dakota

2006-08-23T18:33:00.000-05:00

A group of us went down to the "Kleven cabin" last weekend. It was in South Dakota. This was my first time in South Dakota. At first I didn't think we would get there in one piece but after 5 stops we managed to get there just fine. We killed some wild animals and ate like royalty. It was a good trip. Here are some of the pictures.

Here is my dinner

Jennyjitterbug swingin

Three Chicks in a blanket

Hugh made his 1st batch of bacon. Congratulations Hugh!!

COWS AND SEAGULLS!! COWS AND SEAGULLS!!

Hugh- If I sit here long enough maybe I will not have to go out there.

Darn!!

Faster, Faster!!

Sara in the cute hat

Theresa checking out the hot guys on jet skis.

Viv the daring tuber! Was that a flip?

Lunch!!

One of the views on top of the tower we climbed

Hi Hugh!!

The celebration up top

"Are we going to have to climb back down"

"Look at that lovely wood", Have ever seen wood this wonderful" "Yeah and the bolts are equally amazing"

I think this is the first fire I've ever made!!!

"Now don't tell "Onionboy" we put this in the fridge." "Cheers!"

What happens when you put 4 mentos in a bottle of pop?

I thought this was one the cutest dogs I've ever seen. Next time I get dog they're going to have big ears.

The fearless crew! Where is Hugh?

We stopped at Sioux Falls on the way back

Did you guys take another group picture? What's taking you so long!

This is my favorite

Sara wanted to know if I saw her falling down

Sara- "I made it through my first camping trip"

Shoot! I couldn't put up any bad pictures of Jenny!

I just sat down to rest. This place is so beautiful.

2006-08-12T13:11:00.000-05:00

I just sat down to rest. This place is so beautiful.

P Cats At Botanical Center.

2006-08-12T12:28:00.000-05:00

I didn't know these guys were going to be here! What a treat! I want someone to dance with.

Another Test

2006-08-09T18:00:00.000-05:00

What Classic Movie Are You?
personality tests by similarminds.com

I found this personality test on Becky's blog. It's a cool one. There is probably a million of these things.

Jungle Week

2006-08-08T15:38:00.000-05:00

I won this little bird several minnutes ago playing jungle bingo. It's Employee Appreciaton Week which means I'm in a jungle adventure ALL week!!

I'm Grace Kelly!

2006-08-07T17:28:00.000-05:00

My roommate sent me an email quiz to find out what movie star you resembled the most. It's scary how accurate this is. I wish I knew how to put a link on so you could find out to.

(35-42 points) You are GRACE KELLY:
You are a lover. Romance, flowers, and wine are all
you need to enjoy yourself. You are serious about all
commitments and are a family person. You call your
Mom every Sunday, and never forget a Birthday. Don't
let your passion for romance get confused with the real
thing.

It would be cool if they had a quiz to find out what movie star you are most compatible with.

Cooking Peas

2006-08-06T22:11:00.001-05:00

My friend called me up on Friday and invited me to go with her to the chiropractor. We went in Saturday morning. I had never been to a chiropractor before but it turned out I really needed to go. He aligned my back and cracked my neck. I appreciated this guy's honesty. I must have heard several times "you're in bad shape". I didn't think I could make so much noise. I've had a pain in my neck for a couple months and now it's gone!!
My back and shoulder however; are a different story. They feel worse then before. I've been putting a bag frozen peas on to get the swelling down and taking muscle relaxers. The peas are softer then ice but just as cold. They help it feel better. My friend told me that it's normal for me to be reacting this way so I'm not worried. Maybe this will help my dancing. :-)

Happy Birthday Flapper!!!

2006-08-03T21:50:00.000-05:00

Flapper had his 15th birthday today!! I had his parent's when I was little. I can't believe that it's been this long. This little guy has been through everything with me. I gave him a honey stick to share with his roommate Baby.

Dance With Me

2006-08-02T22:16:00.000-05:00

I've been listening to this song tonight. I thought my Christian friends might enjoy the words. If you are not a Christian you might enjoy it to. It's called "May I Have This Dance?" on Julaine's CD may i have this dance?

May I have this dance Lord with the one that saved my soul.
A lifetime of following your lead, Lord take control.
Take me in your arms Jesus. Let me hold the hand pierced for me.
May I have this dance following your lead.
Here in this place. I want to stay.
Were I can see your face up close and hear you breath.
Keep me in your arms Jesus. Let me hold the hand pierced for me.
May I have this dance eternally

May I have this dance, child with the one that I died for.
I'll show you many, many things and if you ask I'll give you more.
Come into my arms child, You'll be loved and you will be free.
To dance across this land just you and me.

Fun, Fun, Fun

2006-07-30T03:46:00.000-05:00

What a fun night!!! Some old friends came over from Iowa. We had dinner at Olive Garden and then came over to play cards. Some of them stayed over until 3:15am. I hope they are getting home safely. I'm really tired and can't really get into the details. Maybe some of the other people will blog about it. hint hint. Goodnight.

Late Night Snack

2006-07-29T01:01:00.000-05:00

I just downed a crunch rap. Taco Bell is quickly becoming a Friday night tradition for me. I want it so bad after dancing several hours. Actually I don't even think it has anything to do with dancing. Friday nights are the one night where I stay out past midnight and Mexican food just has so much flavor at that time of the day.
I used to eat Mexican food late all time. My brother is the best chef of Mexican food I know. He used to get into these cooking frenzies around 2am. I didn't get much sleep during that time but there was no way I was going to miss his creations. He didn't ever use a recipe. He just followed his gut and it was wonderful. It was such a trill to have him make me something. Taco Bell doesn't really have the same effect but at least it gives me a hint to what once was.

Happy Birthday Eric!

2006-07-26T07:38:00.000-05:00

Eric "Onion Beard" celebrated his birthday at Troy and Mae's last night. It was a pirate theme. Arrrr!

The Two Worlds Collide

2006-07-17T16:33:00.000-05:00

Some of the Jitterbugs came to the program today. It was so awesome!! We had about 10 people counting me. The participants and staff absolutely LOVED IT! After they left, all I heard the rest of the day was how great everybody was. Some of the them got a little confused when I said they had jobs. They thought they were professional dancers that did that for a living.
It was also great that my friends saw where I worked. I enjoyed introducing them to a couple of my co-workers.
I think I need to do this again.

News since Tuesday

2006-07-13T19:19:00.000-05:00

It was my turn to lead the staff weight and wellness group yesterday. I talked about the health benefits of dancing and taught my co-workers how to dance. We just did the basic east coast swing but I think they really enjoyed it. It was a chance for me to practice my leading skills which turned out okay. Maybe they'll join in on Monday.
I have found an amazing knew drug that helps me feel better. Well it's not really a drug but a vitamin. I took it sporadically a couple months ago but on Tuesday I started taking it every day. I haven't been eating much meat so I decided to get some iron. It has actually improved my mood. It's very frustrating to have nothing really wrong with you but still feel like crap emotionally. I haven't felt like crap since Monday. This is great! Why didn't I do this earlier? Oh well.

Quicky

2006-07-11T16:14:00.000-05:00

Alright I have 10 minutes and 20 seconds of computer time left and want to see how much I could right. I'm getting really excited about this coming Monday. The participants have been excited about the Jitterbugs coming but now the staff are getting excited about it to. I talk about people at JNO all the time (all good stuff). I think they want to put faces to my descriptions. I got 10 so far. It's going to be awesome!!! I just picked up a great hit vocals of the Big Band Years to get them in the mood.
5 more minutes. What else can I say? I should leave time for spell check so I guess that's all I'm going to say for now.

2006-07-09T00:54:00.000-05:00

I know almost nothing about cars. If my car holds 15 gallons of gas, how come I just filled 15.06 gallons of that?

4th of July Recap

2006-07-05T16:53:00.000-05:00

I usually try to get something posted on holidays but it didn't work out this time. I hope everybody had a good 4th of July. Mine was a good one. I marched with the Jitterbugs in the parade. I think I enjoyed the one yesterday better then the Juneteeth. This one was shorter and the crowd was more pleasant and spirit filled.

When I started walking back to my car I noticed a strange thing hanging from my YMCA tag. The tag has been hanging on my rear view mirror for several years now but this time it had my agency bag connected to the bottom of it. I thought it was strange but I knew I had some friends in the restaurant I was at. I thought they might know something so I went and asked them about it. They didn't know anything. I went out to my car again and started to get ready to go and I noticed that my toy bear was connected to my shifter. When I turned my car on the wipers started going and the fan was on full blast. When I was about half way down the road I noticed they had turned the heat on full blast as well. I was trying to figure what happened since I was one of the first people back. I determined that the only logical explanation for all of this is that I have a secrete admirer. I know how intimidating I can be and this was the only way they could show there feelings for me. This just isn't the way to my heart. If they would just confess there love for me it would be so much easier.

After the hi-jinx of love I went to my parent's house for the rest of night. At first I wanted to hang out with a group of people but once the night came I just wanted to be with family. My dad picked up the 3 fireworks that I grew up with. It just wouldn't be the same with out ground flowers, fountains, and sparklers. In California anything else was illegal. When I left my mom apologized for the night's lack of excitement but it actually brought a bit of childhood back. I wouldn't have enjoyed anything more.

Except for the identity of my secrete admirer.

2006-07-03T00:53:00.000-05:00

I just got done watching my second scary movie in a week. I don't like scary movies and got to stop doing this to myself.

Another Late One

2006-07-02T01:29:00.000-05:00

I just got back from quit a busy night. I started out by going to a birthday party. One of my co-workers turned 30 yesterday. She had some great food including some of the tastiest brisket I've ever had. The party is probably still going on even though it's almost 2am. After an hour and a half I went down to Shakespeare on the Green to see Antony and Cleopatra. I liked the play because it was Shakespeare but for some reason I had a hard time following it. It jumped around very quickly and even though I'm familiar with Antony and Cleopatra, I don't know it as well as his other plays. One of the reasons I love Shakespeare however is that he shows how human people are and this play did that. I'm still glad I went.
When the play was over I went to an ice cream shop with some of the people I was with. Then we walked through the old market and some Con Agra sprinklers. It was great getting to know people. We ended up walking all over the river front for over an hour. As far as I know I think the river front is the most romantic place in down town. I love the history and how peaceful it is there. Some day I'm going to go on one of the boats.
I think I want some sleep now.

Sleepless night

2006-06-30T04:17:00.000-05:00

I fell asleep around 7pm. I've been up since 11pm and it's 20 after four. This is the second night in a row that I haven't been able to sleep. I'm so tired. It's amazing what one can think about when they've moved past the zombie stage. I don't think however; it would be a good idea for me to reflect on it at the moment. I think sleeplessness might have close to the same potency as drunkenness as far as it's influence on communicating thoughts. I don't want to get myself into trouble. It must remain a mystery.

Now the last 3 months I have rejected caffeine in order to detox myself. Should I stay up for my last hour and pump myself full of caffeine or lay down. I think either way I'm going to fall off the wagon.

No... It's a thumb

2006-06-28T22:41:00.000-05:00

I went down to my friend's cabin tonight. They have been doing some work on it and needed some help. All I did was paint the picnic table while the guys did woodwork. I had a good time. Painting is really enjoyable to me. I think half my enjoyment also came from watching the guys try to figure out how to accomplish there project. This is the out house in their backyard. It has nothing to do with why we were there but it's really funny looking. It's supposed to be a thumb but I think it looks more like a toe.

More Camping Pics... Finally

2006-06-28T22:21:00.000-05:00

Jenny Crack Corn And I Don't Care...

2006-06-24T19:52:00.000-05:00

Jenny learned how to prepar corn for the grill tonight. Thank you Jenny but I'm only eating one.

Four Sexy Sardines

2006-06-24T16:15:00.000-05:00

The four of us had to cram into the back seat after hiking 2 hours outside Louisvill and eating ice cream. I really want to go swimming next.

Nebraska: The Good Life

2006-06-24T14:55:00.000-05:00

We crossed this vicious waterfall. I remember Niagra being a little different.

How long does it take to put up a tent

2006-06-24T12:56:00.000-05:00

Apparently for these guys it took over a half hour. For Jenny and I 10 minnutes.

Night Off

2006-06-23T22:48:00.000-05:00

I didn't go to Jitterbugs tonight. For some reason the right side of my neck started hurting yesterday and I could hardly turn my head. It got better tonight but I didn't think twisting around would be a good idea. I was really looking forward to tonight since there was a live band and people were going dress up. I think I needed a day off though. I took some pictures, bought a ice cream cone, and went to my church parking lot to think for awhile. It was so nice outside, cool and peaceful. I decided to play on swings. There is something about swings that helps one feel better. I think everybody should play on the swings at least 4 times a year. After doing that I got the crazy inkling to go buy some shoes. I don't even remember the last time I bought anything besides food. I got a couple pair. When that was over I dropped a video off at my parent's house, talked to the bird for awhile, came back here, and started writing.

Jitterbugs is almost over. I hope the band was good and my friends had a good time. I'm going to bed now.

I'm Feeling Technical

2006-06-20T15:45:00.000-05:00

I finally decided to figure out how to get my comments forwarded to my email, YAHOO!!! It only took a year and a month. Well actually I didn't even know it was possible until maybe 6 months ago so it really isn't that bad. I don't know if it worked yet. I gauss I'll see soon enough. Send me a comment. It's going to be very exciting.

Happy Father's Day

2006-06-18T22:46:00.000-05:00

Happy Father's Day. I think my dad had a good day. My mom cooked him some lumpia, sushi, beef on a stick, broccoli beef, chocolate moose, and water melon. He got some nice stuff to grill out with and some bins for organizing.

This year Father's Day had a little more meaning to me. Over the years I have learned to think of God as my father but this year I think I understand it more. Recently I have once again gotten a taste of His guidance and loving discipline. It's a strange feeling when you feel crappy and loved at the same time.

Lately I've been listening to some of my friends talk about their fathers. Sometimes it seems like most of the fathers here are jerks. I wish more of them would understand how much God is not like our earthly father. It says "Yet the Lord longs to be gracious to you; He rises to show you compassion..." Isaiah 30:18 and "He is Father to the Fatherless..." Psalms 68:5. My father wasn't the nicest one growing up but I've seen him try to change. With God's help I have learned to forgive him. If there is anybody reading this that didn't have a good relationship with their father my prayer for you is that you would understand how much God the father unconditionally loves you very very much.

Let's all go to a parade

2006-06-17T16:42:00.000-05:00

Some of the Jitterbugs danced and marched in the Juneteenth parade today. This is the after picture. It was fun but very exhausting. Most of us got there around 9am. We didn't start moving until about 10:30am. We got to the end at 12:55pm. The music from Mo's car was good when we heard it. When we didn't we danced to the drill team that was right in front of us. The audience seemed to really like us. We handed out almost every flier we had. For some of us, this was the first parade we took part in. There was much learned for next time so here is some good wisdom for you. When you're marching in a parade make sure you provide transportation at the end.

Grrrrr

2006-06-14T18:08:00.000-05:00

Follow the yellow brick road, Follow the yellow brick road, Follow, Follow, Follow, Follow, Follow the yellow brick road...

We had our Wizard of Oz day at work. We had Dorothy, the Wicked Witch, the Witch of the North, the Tin Man, the Scare Crow, and Anti Em. I was the lion. It was so much fun. In the morning each person had a game for the participants to do. My game was throwing bean bags on scary pictures. If they got one on a picture (or didn't) I gave them a courage metal and a sucker. We served them a Emerald City lunch complete with green foods. After lunch they got there pictures taken with the tin man and watched the Wizard of Oz movie. I wish I could put up pictures of all the decorations and the rope tail that got some lauphs, oh well. Everybody had a good time.

The long post

2006-06-03T17:18:00.000-05:00

People have always said I was shy. It's been the part of me I've excepted for years. I never spoke to anybody in school. When I was 12 my teacher noticed how much I was having a hard time and had me tested for learning disabilities. It turned out I had several. I don't know exactly what they were called. All I remember is that I had to start going to a Resource Program a couple hours a day and speech therapy once a week. It took them awhile to figure out what was going on because I could speak well and I was very intelligent. I just came across as a kid that was very quiet, extremely depressed, and isolated. I didn't have any friends. I just escaped into the television set when I came home from school. After my tests I started working very hard to "fix" the problem. Each year I got better and in Jr. High I was testing at a college level in some areas. They gave me the choice to leave the program or stay and use it for homework time. I used it for homework time until my sophomore year of high school. I decided I was strong enough to handle things on my own. That was freakin stupid. I almost didn't graduate from high school.
I've noticed other issues in my life since then. It turns out it's not something one can fix. It stays with you the rest of your life. I could work around obstacles to get things done but it effects every part of my life.
I am not one that likes to revel on loss or short comings. I believe that God has made me and my friends for a specific purpose but I've been extremely Angry with this lately. I went on the Internet and started researching Adults with disabilities. I found the definition and I highlighted all the symptoms I thought applied to me.

Definition:
The scientific diagnosis of learning disabilities has focused primarily on the "discrepancy model". This method describes learning disabilities as discrepancies between expectations based on IQ and actual performance. If it appears that the person has problems perceiving, processing, comprehending, retaining, or retrieving certain types of information, despite having a normal or greater level of intelligence and regardless of effort and opportunity, then she or he is considered to be learning disabled.

Symptoms:
5. Frustrated by unsuccessful attempts to read, write, spell, and speak correctly.
6. Feeling as if you are "faking" your education: people say you are smart, but you don't genuinely feel this is true even though you may be getting good grades.
4. Feeling that your own work is infantile or crude or otherwise not as good as that of others, and that your output does not reflect the complexity of your thinking.
3. Frequent spelling errors (e.g., omissions, substitutions, transpositions), especially in specialized and foreign vocabulary.
8. Fear of filling out forms and applications and using the telephone.
9. Isolation: fear of not being understood.
10. Intensified self-consciousness and stress because of your other problems.
1. Inability to concentrate on and to comprehend spoken language when presented rapidly.
3. Slow to start and to complete tasks.
4. Repeated inability, on a day-to-day basis, to recall what has been taught.
2. Difficulty in orally expressing concepts that they seem to understand.
3. Difficulty speaking grammatically correct English.
4. Difficulty following or having a conversation about an unfamiliar idea.
5. Trouble telling a story in the proper sequence.
6. Difficulty following oral or written directions.

This stupid diagnosis is effecting my performance at work, my relationships, and robbing me of my self-worth. I want it out of my life but it will not go away.
I still believe in Ephesians 2:10 "For we are God's workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do." I just want to understand what the purpose for this is. There has to be good purpose.

My apologies to anybody who might think this post was too personal but I don't really care.

www.haverford.edu/ods/learning.html

Squeakers

2006-05-29T18:50:00.000-05:00

Check out who has moved into my parent's house while I was gone. I think it's just for the summer but we'll see what happens. Animals tend to stay here.

Healthful Living

2006-05-25T19:34:00.000-05:00

I don't know what I should say but it's been almost two weeks since I've posted so I think I should say something. I was going to go to Bible study tonight but I started looking at all the stuff I had to do. That's probably not a good reason but I knew it wouldn't get done tomorrow. I got part of it done. I'm also really tired tonight. I don't know what it is. I've been trying to take it easy during the week but for some reason Thursday is just a very sleepy day. Maybe I need some Iron.
I think I put my mom at ease. She has been bugging the heck out me because she thinks I'm showing signs of diabetes. I finely got tired of it. On Wednesday I fasted for 13 hours. Then I went to work and asked the nurse to check my blood sugar. It was 94, which is a very good. Of course I know you can't really tell if a person is diabetic unless you examine what there blood sugar has been like the past three months but at least that was some good news. After I called my mom about it she seemed to feel better. I wish she wouldn't worry so much but I know that's what she is going to do. It's nice to have someone that cares.

Dancing Mommy

2006-05-14T21:50:00.000-05:00

Happy Mother's Day!! I hope everybody got a chance to do something for your mom. My mom and I got to hang out a little bit. This is her dancing with Billy at Lindy in the Park. Going to Lindy in the Park wasn't in my plans but I think my mom knows how much I hate missing a dance event. She said that she wanted to go. Actually now that I think about it, it makes sense that my mom would want to dance on Mother's Day. My parents used to dance all the time. That's where they meet and fell in love and if I remember correctly the dance floor is where I took my first steps. She said that she had a good time. I love my mom so much. Afterwards she opened up some new shirts and lotion. My dad grilled some ribs, she talked to my brother on the phone, and we watched a movie. I think it was a good day.

ONE YEAR DOWN!!!!

2006-05-09T22:14:00.000-05:00

YAHOO!!! By God's grace I made it. It was one year ago today that I started working at the Program!! I have vacation days know!! YIPEEEE!!! I decided to celebrate it by asking for vacation on Cowtown weekend!!!

Two works of Art

2006-05-04T17:30:00.000-05:00

I got to work this morning and found this on my desk. Isn't it great! This is one of many things I find on my desk sometimes. The staff that I work with are so much fun and they seem to do stuff just when I need it the most. Sometimes I think of them more as family. However; I don't feel very supportive of this family at the moment. Another one of our participants passed away on Monday and I should be going with them to the services tonight. I don't think I'm going to go. They said that he looked great today but I'd rather remember him as he was. He was such a noble gentlemen. He always had a smile and positive things to say. When I would come in he sometimes said Just a second ago I saw a beautiful bright light come into the room and then I saw it was you. I'm going to miss him. Today I found out however; that he has had 10 grandchildren, 5 great grandchildren, and one great, great, grandson so I know at 92 he has lived a full life.